Monday, Aug. 2, 2021
Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Being a good manager doesn’t mean managing someone else’s life!
Some of us sharing these meetings mistakenly thought we were supposed to manage everyone and everything. We managed children and spouses, and when we could, neighbors, co-workers, and friends. And we saw our ability to manage other people’s lives as proof of our worthiness. Letting others manage themselves, however, is the real asset, and working on its development takes perseverance.
The appeal of managing others is clearly to protect ourselves. When we can’t count on them to do what we want without our input, then we must get involved. Unfortunately, over the years many people let us manage them. Oftentimes their alcoholism or other drug dependence opened the door to us. We took this as a sign that we were needed. Learning now that we are needed, but not to manage others, is a challenging lesson.
I won’t manage others’ lives today. I can offer suggestions to others, if asked, but I will only manage myself.
Hazelden Foundation
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