Saturday, Oct. 6, 2018
"The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 2 ("There Is a Solution"), p 24.
Today, if the numbing physical and psychological impact of my last drunk has been weakened by the passage of time, let my defense be the outcome of my last drunk - likely the same consequence, if not worse, of every drunk before the last one. I have long since passed the point that a drunk tonight will be less physically and less costly than my last drunk, even if it was years ago. My sobriety today does not promise I will be sober tomorrow, but it does promise that I have a choice today to drink or not. If the memory of the physical and emotional toll of my last drunk has been salved by the passage of time, pray I know that I and I alone will be responsible for the consequences of another drunk. And lest I forget that those if consequences were too heavy then, they will probably be too heavy - or heavier - now. Today, I have the choice, and I choose not to forget my last drunk so that I have the choice not to drink. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2018
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