March 31, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Sunday, March 31, 2019

Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

Opening ourselves to love

Allowing ourselves to receive love is one of the greatest challenges we face in recovery.

Many of us have blocked ourselves from receiving love. We may have lived with people who used love to control us. They would be there for us, but at the high price of our freedom. Love was given, or withheld, to control us and have power over us. It was not safe for us to receive love from these people. We may have gotten accustomed to not receiving love, not acknowledging our need for love, because we lived with people who had no real love to give.

At some point in recovery, we acknowledge that we, too, want and need to be loved. We may feel awkward with this need. Where do we go with it? What do we do? Who can give us love? How can we determine who is safe and who isn’t? How can we let others care for us without feeling trapped, abused, frightened, and unable to care for ourselves?

We will learn. The starting point is surrendering – to our desire to be loved, our need to be nurtured and loved. We will grow confident in our ability to take care of ourselves with people. We will feel safe enough to let people care for us; we will grow to trust our ability to choose people who are safe and who can give us love.

We may need to get angry first—angry that our needs have not been met. Later, we can become grateful to those people who have shown us what we don’t want, the ones who have assisted us in the process of believing we deserve love, and the ones who come into our life to love us.

We are opening up like flowers. Sometimes it hurts as the petals push open. Be glad. Our heart is opening up to the love that is and will continue to be there for us.

Surrender to the love that is there for us, to the love that people, the Universe, and our Higher Power send our way.

Surrender to love, without allowing people to control us or keep us from caring for ourselves. Start by surrendering to love for yourself.

Today, I will open myself to the love that is here for me. I will let myself receive love that is safe, knowing I can take care of myself with people. I will be grateful to all the people from my past who have assisted me in my process of opening up to love. I claim, accept, and am grateful for the love that is coming to me.

Hazelden Foundation

March 31, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step

Sunday, March 31, 2019

Today, no self-pity to shake my recovery regardless if my recovery began 24 months or 24 hours ago. Self-pity may be the deadliest of poisons that can undo, in the blink of an eye, any progress I've made. Self-pity is giving up my belief and total surrender to my Higher Power and is the epitome of selfishness. If there is adversity this day, I will face it with the courage, strength, hope and dignity with which AA endows me, and I've already been endowed with courage, strength, hope and dignity merely by committing myself to recovery. Nor will I whine, "Why me?" And if I say no to self-pity today, I have no reason or excuse to drink, to use - and this day, then, will be good. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2019

March 31, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Sunday, March 31, 2019

AA Thought for the Day

Since I've been in AA, have I made a start towards being more unselfish? Do I no longer want my own way in everything? When things go wrong and I can't have what I want, do I no longer sulk? Am I trying not to waste money on myself? And does it make me happy to see my family and my home have enough attention from me?

Am I trying not to be all get and no give?

Meditation for the Day

Each day is a day of progress, steady progress forward, if you make it so. You may not see it, but God does. God does not judge by outward appearance. He judges by the heart. Let Him see in your heart a simple desire always to do His will. Though you may feel that your work has been spoiled or tarnished, God sees it as an offering for Him. When climbing a steep hill, a person is often more conscious of the weakness of his stumbling feet than of the view, the grandeur or even of the upward progress.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may persevere in all good things. I pray that I may advance each day in spite of my stumbling feet.

Hazelden Foundation

March 31, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Sunday, March 31, 2019

Reflection for the Day
My illness is unlike most other illnesses in that denial that I am sick is a primary symptom that I am sick. Like such other incurable illnesses as diabetes and arthritis, however, my illness is characterized by relapses. In The Program, we call such relapses "slips." The one thing I know for certain is that I alone can cause myself to slip.

Will I remember at all times that the thought precedes the action? Will I try to avoid "stinking thinking?"

Today I Pray
May God give me the power to resist temptations. May the responsibility for giving in, for having a "slip," be on my shoulders and mine only. May I see beforehand if I am setting myself up for a slip by blame-shifting, shirking my responsibility to myself, becoming the world's poor puppet once again. My return to those old attitudes can be as much of a slip as the act of losing my sobriety.

Today I Will Remember
Nobody's slip-proof.

Hazelden Foundation

March 31, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener

Sunday, March 31, 2019

We as alcoholics are so used to getting by with a minimum of effort on our part that we sometimes fail to appreciate that only those things earned have any real lasting value.

We allowed our families to cover up for us and support us, we panhandled, we were experts in the game of something for nothing.

Nothing free is worth having. AA has no initiation fees or dues, but it also costs a lot if you want to get a lot. You can procure a two-bit brand of AA, but we don't guarantee it will work.

Hazelden Foundation

March 31, 2019 - Good morning to a worry- and stress-free Sunday with determination to make it good

March 30, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Saturday, March 30, 2019

Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

I meant to do my work today But a brown bird sang in an apple tree, and a butterfly flitted across the field and all the leaves were calling me.  — Richard LeGallienne

The harried hen scurried about her house, trying to put it in order. Some friends she hadn’t seen for years were due to arrive later that day, and she wanted everything perfect for them. In a flurry, she made the bed, put away the dishes, and scrubbed the floor. Oh dear, she thought in dismay, I meant to wash the sheets today. Frantically, she flew back to the bedroom and tore the sheets from the made bed.

Just then, a neighbor arrived and stood at hen’s door, watching her anxiously rush about. “Dear hen,” he said in a patient loving tone, for he was quite fond of her, “You will never enjoy your visit if you continue to race about. Come. Sit and rest and tell me of these friends. Have you any snapshots?” The hen did as her neighbor had suggested, and soon her friends arrived to find her relaxed, refreshed, and warm with the memories of them.

What is my real work for the day?

Hazelden Foundation

March 30, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step
Saturday, March 30, 2019

Today, I cannot crumble to the temptation of "just one" drink. Regardless of how many 24 Hours of sobriety, none of us is immune to the thought, however fleeting, that maybe one drink won't do any damage. Of course it will, as we know from bitter experience. If temptation is a human foible, it is one that none of us in recovery can afford. For us, temptation is our failure to integrate into the deepest of our souls the Program's first four words - "Admitted we were powerless ..." Temptation is also our self-will run riot and rejection of surrendering our will to our Higher Power. Still, if temptation sneaks in, may I have imprinted in my conscience the outcome of all those times in the past when I did cave. And the memory of that outcome is too costly and painful to give in. Today, I hope I am not tempted, but I will not take for granted that I won't so that, if I am, I am strong and secure enough in my Program to rise above it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2019

March 30, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Saturday, March 30, 2019

AA Thought for the Day

Before I met AA, I was very unloving. From the time I went away to school, I paid very little attention to my mother and father. I was on my own and didn't even bother to keep in touch with them. After I got married, I was very unappreciative of my spouse. Many a time I would go out all by myself to have a good time. I paid too little attention to our children and didn't try to understand them or show them affection. My few friends were only drinking companions, not real friends.

Have I gotten over loving nobody but myself?

Meditation for the Day

Be calm, be true, be quiet. Do not get emotionally upset by anything that happens around you. Feel a deep, inner security in the goodness and purpose in the universe. Be true to your highest ideals. Do not let yourself slip back into the old ways of reacting. Stick to your spiritual guns. Be calm always. Do not talk back or defend yourself too much against accusation, whether false or true. Accept abuse as well as you accept praise. Only God can judge the real you.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not be upset by the judgment of others. I pray that I may let God be the judge of the real me.

Hazelden Foundation

March 30, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time

Saturday, March 30, 2019

Reflection for the Day

"When I meditate upon such a vision," Bill W. continued, "I need not be dismayed because I shall never attain it, nor need I swell with presumption that one of these days its virtues shall all be mine. I only need to dwell on the vision itself, letting it grow and ever more fill my heart ...Then I get a sane and healthy idea of where I stand on the highway to humility. I see that my journey towards God has scarcely begun. As I thus get down to my right size and stature, my self-concern and importance become amusing."

Do I take myself too seriously?

Today I Pray

May the grandiosity which is a symptom of my chemical addiction be brought back into proportion by the simple comparison of my powerlessness with the power of God. May I think of the meaning of Higher Power as it relates to my human frailty. May it bring my ego back down to scale and help me shed my defenses of pomp or bluster or secret ideas of self-importance.

Today I Will Remember

He is great. I am small.

Hazelden Foundation

March 30, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener

Saturday, March 30, 2019

The truly great man can afford to be humble, for hundreds of others are exalting him. You have only one horn to blow and other people can't toot it if you are eternally tooting it yourself.

The proud man is aggressive in his own interest; the humble man is aggressive in the ideals he believes in. Humility is not passive resignation; it is, rather, subjecting self for lofty purposes.

Hazelden Foundation

March 30, 2019 - Good morning to a let's-just-kick-back-and-take-it-easy Saturday and weekend

March 29, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Friday, March 29, 2019

Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

The first skill needed for the Inner Game is called “letting it happen.” — W. Timothy Gallwey

A strange and intriguing mystery confronts us in the Twelve Steps. We are mending our ways; we are becoming accountable; we are striving to do what is right, yet we are learning to let go. This seems like a contradiction of logic, but it leads us to a spiritual awakening.

We are becoming like the accomplished tennis player who has practiced diligently to develop every detail of his skill. Yet when he is playing the game, he cannot focus on control. He must get his ego out of the way and let himself go. It is in letting go that he rises to his highest level of fulfillment. Today we will do what we must. We can make the choices we are faced with. Then we allow ourselves to be carried along by our Higher Power to complete and fulfill the process.

I will look for opportunities to let it happen today.

Hazelden Foundation

March 29, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step

Friday, March 29, 2019

Today, if I start out with dread, I probably need to do a 10th Step or re-do my Fourth. Clearly something is wrong and I have not yet reaped benefits of sobriety or, worse, I am little more than a dry drunk. The Serenity Prayer tells me that I have no control over what this day might serve up, but it also tells me what I can change is me. The Program gives me the tools to do it, from its first four words - "Admitted (I am) powerless" - to the 12th Step's promise of a new me through a spiritual awakening and its command to practice all the Steps "in all (my) affairs." And if I take the attitude that the day ahead is something to just get through, I will likely make it a self-fulfilling prophecy. Today, I am powerless over whatever this day has in store, but my attitude can make or break the serenity that recovery promises. Sobriety and life are not to simply to endure or just get through. Today, I will live, not just endure or get through. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2019

March 29, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Friday, March 29, 2019

AA Thought for the Day

Before I met AA, I was very dishonest. I lied to my spouse constantly about where I had been and what I'd been doing. I took time off from my work and pretended I'd been sick or gave some other dishonest excuse. I was dishonest with myself, as well as with other people. I would never face myself as I really was or admit when I was wrong. I pretended to myself that I was as good as the next person, although I suspected I wasn't.

Am I now really honest?

Meditation for the Day

I must live in the world and yet live apart with God. I can go forth from my secret times of communion with God to the work of the world. To get the spiritual strength I need, my inner life must be lived apart from the world. I must wear the world as a loose garment. Nothing in the world should seriously upset me, as long as my inner life is lived with God. All successful living arises from this inner life.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may live my inner life with God. I pray that nothing shall invade or destroy that secret place of peace.

Hazelden Foundation

March 29, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time

Friday, March 29, 2019

Reflection for the Day

What is the definition of humility? "Absolute humility," said AA co-founder Bill W., "would consist of a state of complete freedom from myself, freedom from all the claims that my defects of character now lay so heavily upon me. Perfect humility would be a full willingness, in all times and places, to find and to do the will of God." 

Am I striving for humility?

Today I Pray

May God expand my interpretation of humility beyond abject subservience or awe at the greatness of others. May humility also mean freedom from myself, a freedom which can come only through turning my being over to God's will. May I sense the omnipotence of God, which is simultaneously humbling and exhilarating. May I be willing to carry out His will.

Today I Will Remember

Humility is freedom.

Hazelden Foundation

March 29, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener

Friday, March 29, 2019

Do you want to be happy? Then go buy that strange kid on the corner a bag of candy. It may help cause his teeth to decay, but what's a tooth between two glad hearts?

Hazelden Foundation

March 29, 2019 - Good morning to the rip-roarin', toe-tapping Happy Dance Friday - finally

March 28, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Thursday, March 28, 2019

Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

AA Thought for the Day

The satisfaction you get out of living a sober life is made up of a lot of little things, but they add up to a satisfactory and happy life. You take out of life what you put into it. So I’d say to people coming into AA: “Don’t worry about what life will be like without liquor. Just hang in there and a lot of good things will happen to you. And you’ll have that feeling of quiet satisfaction and peace and serenity and gratitude for the grace of God.”

Is my life becoming really worth living?

Meditation for the Day

There are two paths, one up and one down. We have been given free will to choose either path. We are captains of our souls to this extent only. We can choose the good or the bad. Once we have chosen the wrong path, we go down and down, eventually to death. But if we choose the right path, we go up and up, until we come to the resurrection day. On the wrong path, we have no power for good because we do not choose to ask for it. But on the right path, we are on the side of good and we have all the power of God’s spirit behind us.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be in the stream of goodness. I pray that I may be on the right side, on the side of all good in the universe.

Hazelden Foundation

March 28, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step
Thursday, March 28, 2019

Today, I will not romanticize my drinking days as "fun" or good if a newcomer to the Program or even a veteran talk about "the good old days." By embellishing drinking before "things went bad" and even constructing a vision that any of it was good, I am probably pining for days when I might have drank "safely" without being honest that those days never existed at all. And by longing for non-existent "good old days," I am vulnerable to a slip or relapse and denying the truth that I am now, and forever will be, "powerless over alcohol." More pointedly, if I try to re-do my last drunk into something that is not true, I have basically forgotten my last drunk. And as one of the Program's old sayings goes, if I can't remember my last drunk, I haven't had it. Today, I will remember with honesty how it was and that it has been, so far by the grace of God, my last drunk. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2019

March 28, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Thursday, March 28, 2019

AA Thought for the Day

When you come into an AA meeting, you're not just coming into a meeting, you're coming into a new life. I'm always impressed by the change I see in people after they've been in AA for a while. I sometimes take an inventory of myself to see whether I have changed and, if so, in what way. Before I met AA, I was very selfish. I wanted my own way in everything. I don't believe I ever grew up. When things went wrong, I sulked like a spoiled child and often went out and got drunk.

Am I still all get and no give?

Meditation for the Day

There are two things that we must have if we are going to change our way of life. One is faith, the confidence in things unseen, the fundamental goodness and purpose in the universe. The other is obedience: that is, living according to our faith, living each day as we believe that God wants us to live, with gratitude, humility, honesty, purity, unselfishness and love. Faith and obedience, these two, will give us all the strength we need to overcome sin and temptation and to live a new and more abundant life.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may have more faith and obedience. I pray that I may live a more abundant life as a result of these things.

Hazelden Foundation

March 28, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time

Thursday, March 28, 2019

Reflection for the Day

We must think deeply of all those sick persons still to come to The Program. As they try to make their return to faith and to life, we want them to find everything in The Program that we have found, yet more, if that be possible. No care, no vigilance, no effort to preserve The Program's constant effectiveness and spiritual strength will ever be too great to hold us in full readiness for the day of their homecoming.

How well do I respect the Traditions of The Program?

Today I Pray

God help me to carry out my part in making the group a lifeline for those who are still suffering from addictions, in maintaining the Steps and the Traditions which have made it work for me for those who are still to come. May The Program be a "homecoming" for those of us who share the disease of addiction. May we find common solutions to the common problems which that disease breeds.

Today I Will Remember

To do my part.

Hazelden Foundation

March 28, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener

Thursday, March 28, 2019

Why is the world? Why are we here? What is our purpose? Why must we live and suffer and die? Without God, there would be no answer. We do not know the great extent of God's purpose, but we do know that we as individuals, each and every one, must somehow fit into that purpose.

We can only know God as He has revealed Himself to us. We know His principle attribute is goodness. Therefore, His purpose must be good, and we can best serve that purpose by aspiring to the highest standard of goodness that we can conceive.

Hazelden Foundation

March 28, 2019 - Good morning to a beautiful Thursday with determination to make it really great

March 27, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Wednesday, March 27, 2019

Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

I have a tendency to set up rules and boundaries and then forget that rules are made to be broken, as are boundaries to be expanded and crossed. — Kathleen Casey Theisen

Recovery has given us the freedom to address life honestly, with forethought and a certainty about the rightness of our actions. We need be mindful that what is right today may not be right tomorrow or thereafter. As we move through our experiences, we are changed, and then we look with a new perspective on old conditions. Our new perspective hones our value systems, and yesterday’s rules and boundaries no longer fit today’s situations.

Our growth as women is an unending process. What we confront today with assurance, we prepared for yesterday. And tomorrow will be eased by our definition of today. The program has gifted us with clarity—clarity about ourselves, clarity regarding others, and clarity on how to continue our growth.

My value system awaits finer definition, and every experience, today, presents me with an opportunity for that definition.

Hazelden Foundation

March 27, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Step by Step

Step by Step
Wednesday, March 27, 2019

Today, if I am afraid, anxious, worried or uncertain about anything, I can draw strength from the mercy and blessing of my Higher Power that guided me through the darkness and active alcoholism to face the challenges before me now. If I believe that drinking was the darkest chapter of my life but that I survived with the strength of a Higher Power, I can also believe that the same strength can lead me through a lesser turmoil. Step 2 of coming to believe in a Higher Power is refuge from any storm I am weathering now, and the Third Step of yielding to a greater Power calms any fears or doubts with faith. Today, I can draw strength and hope from the yesterday when I had my last drink to believe that, with faith and strength in the Power that got me through those days, I can get through anything less - with unconditional faith and by seeking His will over mine. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M., 2019

March 27, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Wednesday, March 27, 2019

AA Thought for the Day

You get the power to overcome drinking through the fellowship of other alcoholics who have found the way out. You get power by honestly sharing your past experience by a personal witness. You get power by coming to believe in a Higher Power, the Divine Principle in the universe which can help you. You get power by working with other alcoholics. In these four ways, thousands of alcoholics have found all the power they needed to overcome drinking.

Am I ready and willing to accept this power and work for it?

Meditation for the Day

The power of God's spirit is the greatest power in the universe. Our conquest of each other, the great kings and conquerors, the conquest of wealth, the leaders of the money society, all amount to very little in the end. But he that conquers himself is greater than he who conquers a city. Material things have no permanence. But God's spirit is eternal. Everything really worthwhile in the world is the result of the power of God's spirit.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may open myself to the power of God's spirit. I pray that my relationships with others may be improved by this spirit.

Hazelden Foundation

March 27, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: A Day at a Time

A Day at a Time
Wednesday, March 27, 2019

Reflection for the Day
Storing up grievances is not only a waste of time, but a waste of life that could be lived to greater satisfaction. If I keep a ledger of "oppressions and indignities," I'm only restoring them to painful reality.

"The horror of that moment," the King said, "I shall never, never forget."

"You will, though," said the Queen,

"if you don't make a memorandum of it." - Lewis Carroll, "Through the Looking Glass"

Am I keeping a secret storehouse for the wreckage of my past?

Today I Pray
God keep me from harboring the sludge from the past - grievances, annoyances, grudges, oppressions, wrongs, injustices, put-downs, slights, hurts. They will nag at me and consume my time in rehashing what I "might have said" or done until I face each one, name the emotion it produced in me, settle it as best I can - and forget it. May I empty my storehouse of old grievances.

Today I Will Remember
Don't rattle old bones.

Hazelden Foundation

March 27, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: The Eye Opener

The Eye Opener

Wednesday, March 27, 2019

Many of us can recall being fired from jobs for drinking and at the same time being given a letter of recommendation that spoke in glowing terms about our ability, Of course, the former boss was trying to be kind in avoiding any mention of the drinking problem, but such letters are actually dishonest, and it was equally dishonest when we used them to procure new jobs.

How much better it would have been if they had tried to do something constructive about the problem rather than lowering us in our own esteem by making us a party to the deceit.

Hazelden Foundation

March 27, 2019 - No reason not to have a grand Wednesday because it's a new day, we're alive and we're here

March 26, 2019 - Readings in Recovery: Today's Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation

Tuesday, March 26, 2019

Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:

Freedom

Many of us were oppressed and victimized as children. As adults, we may continue to keep ourselves oppressed.

Some of us don’t recognize that caretaking and not setting boundaries will leave us feeling victimized.

Some of us don’t understand that thinking of ourselves, as victims will leave us feeling oppressed.

Some of us don’t know that we hold the key to our own freedom. That key is honoring ourselves, and taking care of ourselves.

We can say what we mean, and mean what we say.

We can stop waiting for others to give us what we need and take responsibility for ourselves. When we do, the gates to freedom will swing wide.

Walk through.

Today, I will understand that I hold the key to my freedom. I will stop participating in my oppression and victimization. I will take responsibility for myself, and let others do as they may.

Hazelden Foundation